Step Two Page 4

  I reached back behind him and untucked his shirt before sliding it up and over his head. I pulled back slightly so I could look at him. He’s gorgeous in an entirely different way than Tom. Tom is hot. Alex is beautiful and I never get tired of looking at him. I love him. How could he possibly think I wanted anyone but him?

  CHAPTER FIVE

  ALEX

  Ryan suddenly pulled out of my touch and slid down to the floor in front of me. He leaned in and slid his big hands underneath my jean clad ass and lifted me off the bed as he sucked one of my nipples into his mouth. He licked and sucked and then his hot mouth traveled down my chest and across my abs until he got to the waistband of my jeans where his tongue began working its magic. He pulled his hands out and use them to work on the button on my jeans. When he got them unfastened I lifted my ass up and let him pull them off. He leaned his face down over the tent in my boxers and caused me to moan out loud by using his lips to move the fabric out of his way and suck the tip of my cock into his mouth. I was whimpering and moaning as he licked and sucked and my cock went from wood to steel in seconds.

  I suddenly felt his rough hand slide up my thigh and slip into the leg hole of my boxers. I actually held my breath to keep from crying out when the tips of his fingers found my swollen testicles and played across them for a few seconds before closing his big hand softly around them and cupping them in his big palm. He used his other hand and slid the rest of my cock out. His tongue moved to the shaft and he licked his way up to the now leaking tip. “Jesus Ryan…” God, he’d gotten good at this.

  He looked up at me with the tip of my cock pressed against his lips and then he smiled before opening his lips and sucking me in all the way to the back of his throat. My cock pulsed against every sexy, moist part of his mouth as he sucked. And when he moved his other hand from my balls up to my chest and took one of my nipples between his fingers I was afraid I was going to explode right there in the back of his throat. I put my hands in his hair and thrust my hips a few times before finally pulling him up off of me. I was coated with his saliva and although he moved his mouth, his hand was immediately on me, wrapped around tightly and sliding up and down against the moisture he’d left there. It felt so good, but I needed to feel him, inside of me. I leaned forward and put my lips against his ear and said, “I want you, inside of me, baby. Now. Please.”

  He grinned and stood up. My hands were shaking as I tried to help him get his clothes off. He finally stepped back and did it himself. The sight of his naked body still did the same thing to me now that it did the first time I ever saw it. I’m so lucky. He’s so perfect, and I’m crazy for acting like a jealous fool and threatening to ruin what we have.

  He reached into the nightstand and brought out the bottle of lube. He was panting and his big chest was heaving up and down as he coated himself with the silky fluid. I scoot back on the bed and lay back on the pillows, beckoning him to climb on top of me. He didn’t disappoint. I love the feeling of being crushed underneath him. This is the time I loved that he was so much bigger than me the most. I loved that feeling of being dominated by him. He reached down and used what was left of the lube on his fingers to get me ready. My eyes practically rolled back in my head as he slid his thick fingers into me and moved them around. It felt so good but only made me crave him harder. It seemed like he amuses himself like that forever before finally lining himself up against my opening and pushing up into me. His moan as he entered me was almost enough to put me over the top. He grabbed hold of my hips and held onto me tightly while he moves in and out, burying himself as deeply as he could each time and each time he struck my prostate we would both groan in ecstasy.

  He moved slowly for a while, fucking me leisurely and giving both of us a little time to recover from the impending orgasm. But it wasn’t long before he picked up his momentum again and the sound of him slapping against my bare flesh as he plunged all the way to the base of his thick cock was the loudest sound in the room. I reached down between us and took my own throbbing cock into my hand. He kept moving but looked down and watched me as I stroked it. I could feel his body tensing even more as he watched me and the feeling of his hot, tight muscles against my body only sent me hurtling toward the edge of the cliff that much faster. My strokes became faster and my hand slid from my base to tip in frenetic movements that I could feel his hips try and keep pace with. “You’re so fucking sexy Alex,” he grunted out and that was it…my body tensed, my balls swelled and my orgasm shot out against his sweaty, sexy body and dripped back down onto mine. The sight of it was what brought him to the brink and the sounds he made as he came inside of me and the way he felt and the way he made me feel caused my cock to pulse all over again. Nothing in the world feels like being with Ryan and I can’t imagine that anything else would ever even come close.

  After we both recovered, we took a shower together and finished our dinner. Our conversation was a lot more relaxed and I promised him I would stop worrying about Tom. He promised me that he would start thinking about talking to his dad about us. I went to sleep that night with the weight of the world lifted off my shoulders and for almost a week life was all good once again. The following Friday, things changed so rapidly that I hadn’t even noticed them going downhill.

  After a perfect rehearsal of “The Phantom of the Opera” with the girl playing Christine and then another really good rehearsal of “Music of the Night,” my first solo, I was walking on a cloud. Everyone in the auditorium stood still and listened as I sang and when I finished even the stage hands gave me a standing ovation. It was like a shot of adrenaline. I was still riding the cloud when I got back to my dressing room and saw that I had a missed call from my mom. I dialed her back right away. I wanted to tell her how well it was going.

  “Hi, honey! How are you?”

  “I’m fantastic! I just performed my first two songs in front of the entire cast and crew and I think I pretty much blew it away.”

  “Awesome! You were born singing. I could never carry a tune, but you…sang like an angel right off the bat.” I smiled. My mom thought I did everything “like an angel.” If I bomb as an actor I’ll always know that I have at least one unconditionally dedicated fan.

  “Thanks, Mom. So, I was returning your call.”

  “Oh yeah! I wanted to tell you a couple of things. I got our tickets for the show today. Marty and I will both be at opening night on Saturday and at Ryan’s first game. Then I thought maybe on Sunday I will go to your matinee and bring Aubrey with me.”

  “Aubrey?”

  “Oh yeah! That’s the other thing I wanted to tell you. You remember Aubrey Vance, right?”

  “No.”

  “Sure you do.” Mom does this all the time. She insists that I remember people from the past that I have no recollection of at all. I just laughed and said,

  “Okay Mom, but why don’t you refresh my memory…just in case.”

  “She’s Paul’s daughter.”

  “Paul…?”

  “Paul Vance.” I could see this might take a while so I tried to move her along.

  “I really have to get back to rehearsal, Mom. Maybe you could just tell me who they are like I don’t already know?”

  “Okay, smart mouth. Paul Vance is Marty’s best friend from college. They played baseball together. He and his daughter came and spent that first Christmas Marty and I were together with us, remember?” Oh yeah…that first Christmas I spent sulking in my room because the jock next door was still a bully and still turned me on like crazy. I do remember them now. The daughter was extremely annoying. She kept popping into my room unannounced and once she found out I was gay she wanted to act like we were girlfriends.

  To Mom I said, “Oh yeah, I remember. So the daughter lives in the city now?”

  Mom sighed. “They always lived in the city. Paul is head of security at the Empire State Building. He’s been there for over twenty years. That was their first Christmas without her mother and Marty didn’t want them to be alone so
they stayed with us. Ryan and Aubrey really hit it off.” Again, that’s not how I remember it. If I recall, she annoyed Ryan as much as she did me. “Marty and Paul had hopes for years that the two of them would somehow end up together. Marty’s hoping if he has her join us for a few meals and such while we’re in town, something might spark up between them.” She laughed. My stomach felt like someone was twisting my guts. I wasn’t worried Ryan would want her, but I had to wonder if he’d be able to tell Marty he doesn’t want her.

  “Um…has Marty talked to Ryan about this?”

  “He’s trying to be casual about it because he thinks Ryan will object to being set up. He asked Ryan if he was seeing anyone and when Ryan said no…”

  “Ryan said no?” My heart hurt…again.

  “Yes, should he have said something different?”

  I ignored her question and asked, “When was this? When did he say he wasn’t seeing anyone?”

  “They talked last week, I guess…” Ryan told me Marty called. He didn’t tell me about that part of the conversation. Shit. It was another opportunity for him to tell his dad the truth and he’d obviously passed on it, again. “Honey, is Ryan seeing someone?” Mom had that tone like she was asking a question she already knew the answer to. She’s figured out how I feel about Ryan, I’m sure of it. But until he admits how he feels to them, I don’t feel like I can.

  I had to clear the lump from my throat before saying, “You know what Mom? My stage manager is calling me. I have to go. I’ll talk to you later. I love you.” Before she could say another word I hung up. When I turned around, Harry was standing in the doorway.

  “Hey, are you okay?”

  I swallowed hard. “Yeah…yeah, I’m good. Why?”

  He shook his head. “You just look a little pale.”

  “I’m fine.”

  “Good. Well, Miss Standish said for us to take an hour and we’d start again at three. I’m going to grab a cup of coffee over at Crimson Café. You want to go, or do you want anything?”

  How about a latte with a side of a boyfriend that isn’t ashamed to be with me. I blew out a breath and said, “Do you mind if I walk with you? I could use some fresh air.”

  “No, of course not.” I grabbed my jacket and followed Harry out the back door of the theater. As I pulled my jacket on I said,

  “How long are you going to wait for your boyfriend to come out?”

  He looked at his watch and said, “About twelve hours ago.”

  “What?”

  “We broke up last night. We fought until about three a.m. and he left. He took all of his stuff with him so I doubt that he’s coming back.”

  “Shit. I’m sorry man.”

  He shook his head. “Don’t be. It was obvious last night that he never intended to come out.”

  “What happened?” We had made it out to the sidewalk that ran along the busy street alongside the south part of the university. Harry’s legs are really long so I had to almost skip to keep up when we hit the sidewalk.

  “We went out to dinner last night in the village. I guess he thought it would be safe there, that we wouldn’t run into anyone either of us knew. We were having this amazing Indian food in the cutest little restaurant when all of a sudden he looked like he’d seen a ghost and started muttering cuss words under his breath. I asked what was wrong but he just suddenly stood up and walked back toward the bathrooms. I sat there for half an hour before I went to look for him. He wasn’t there.”

  “Shit. Where was he?” We reached the café and I pulled open the door. Harry stepped inside and I followed him. We stood in line and ordered our coffee and while we waited I found us a small table in the back. The coffee shop is popular with the college crowd and always packed.

  “Gone. He’s left out the back door. When I got home, he was sitting on the steps outside my door. He was all full of apologies. He said his aunt and uncle walked in and he couldn’t be seen with me or they’d tell his parents.”

  “That’s ridiculous. He could have just introduced you as a friend or an acquaintance. What was he thinking?”

  “That’s what I asked him. He had the nerve to tell me that I look gay and anyone looking at me would just know.”

  I rolled my eyes and took a sip of my latte. “So, he thinks you look gay and that being seen with you would make his family automatically assume he was gay too? That doesn’t even make sense.”

  “Right? I told him if he was going to stay in the closet then he should date more masculine men. I mean, if he was with someone like…”

  I raised an eyebrow and said, “Ryan?”

  “Yeah, I mean by society’s standards Ryan doesn’t look gay. If he was out with someone like that, he could pull off the “this is my friend” stance. I didn’t use Ryan specifically, but I did tell him that maybe he should date jocks. Between his own masculinity and theirs, no one would ever guess that anyone was gay.”

  “What did he say to that?” Harry took a long drink of his coffee and with a sad look in his eyes he said,

  “He said that maybe I was right. He told me that the last guy he saw was a lot more masculine than me so it made him less nervous to be seen with him in public.”

  “Wow, I’m sorry Harry. That sucks.”

  He nodded and said, “It does, but I’m done. I’m not going to live my life in someone else’s closet.” I thought about Ryan. Sometimes that’s what I felt like I was doing. Ryan is “out” to our friends at school, but he is still not comfortable with it. I don’t miss the way he slightly stiffens and flinches if I touch him at all in public. That kiss in the bleachers last week was the first real PDA we had shared since starting school seven months ago. I suddenly wondered if I was more masculine in my looks if he would be more comfortable being seen with me in public, and maybe even more comfortable telling his dad.

  “I’m sorry Harry,” I said again. “Let me know if I can do anything to help?”

  “How about a movie tonight?”

  That took me by surprise. “What?”

  He smiled. “Maybe we could open a bottle of wine and commiserate over a Mark Walberg movie.”

  I laughed. “Mark Walberg? You really do go for that hot, masculine type.”

  He shrugged. “What can I say? I think you’re as bad as me, though, judging from what I saw of your boyfriend the other day.”

  I couldn’t deny that. The hot masculine type has always appealed to me in a way that almost threatened to kill me. It was my concern that Ryan also enjoyed the hot masculine type too…which I was definitely not. “I have another idea…if you’re up for it,” I told him. His eyes lit up. I’m not sure what he thought I was going to say, but the next words out of my mouth doused the light and contorted his face into an “Are you freaking kidding me?” stare. “Let’s go to the gym.”

  CHAPTER SIX

  RYAN

  I watched as Alex yawned, stretched and rolled over in bed. He turned so he was facing me but hadn’t opened his eyes yet. His face was covered with stubble. It was light and when I touched it last night, it felt like the down on a baby duck…but it was stubble. As long as I’ve known Alex, and that was a lot longer than I’d loved him, I’d never seen him with any form of hair on his face…or the rest of his body for that matter. He shaves religiously. He exfoliates. He moisturizes. I used to give him a ration of shit about it when we lived at home because he’d leave his products all over our shared bathroom. I was a mean S.O.B. and I’d tell him it was like living with a woman. I called him a Diva. I called him a queen. I called him a lot of things and none of them were nice. My chest still hurt now when I thought about it. But I knew now why I’d acted that way. It was because I had to deny how much he turned me on. Now the new question is, why is my sexy, smooth, wiry little boyfriend suddenly morphing into something entirely new…and not nearly as appealing?

  The stubble was just the beginning. For the past few weeks, every time I went away for a game or stayed late at practice for a few nights, something else would be d
ifferent when I got back. Sometimes it was small things, like his deodorant. He’s always used this organic stuff that doesn’t have any smell to it but suddenly he’s using Brut or Old Spice or some shit. He’s changed his shampoo too. His smelled like coconuts and other tropical stuff. I loved to bury my face in it. This new one was straight up head and shoulders…I mean, it’s not a dandruff shampoo, but it had that medicine smell and it completely neutralized the Alex smell that I loved. Now he just smelled like one of the guys in my locker room when they came out of the shower. I should have noticed all of this while it was happening, but it hadn’t really hit me until this morning and then it was like a ton of bricks.

  “Hey.” His pretty blue eyes fluttered open and he caught me staring at him.

  “Hey.”

  He smiled. His smile drives me crazy, but I prefer it without all that red/blonde hair around his pretty lips. “What are you doing? Don’t you have classes today?”

  “Yeah. I’m late.”

  He chuckled and his hot body shook and mine reacted in spite of all the changes. I guess that’s what love does for you. He reached his bare arms up over his head then and stretched and I saw the muscles in his forearms flex. My body was still reacting to him, but what the hell is that? Alex runs every day and that’s how he usually stays in shape. Those muscles aren’t from running.

  “Why?” He sat up and the covers fell down to his waist. His chest even looked fuller.